Come What May...and Love It
This has been a week of changes. I don't like change, I thought I did, I thought I was a person that can soar through changes, because I've had many in the past and seemed to do fine. Maybe it's my old age, or maybe I'm just sick and tired of change! Or maybe just too many at once, good or bad, is too much.
It all started with a "new to us" couch--yipee, something that I've wanted for sooo long (anyone who was acquainted with the old green dump of a couch we previously owned knows why), but still it was hard for me to do it; like maybe I didn't deserve a "new" couch, and maybe I am getting out of my comfort zone, anyway, the acquisition of said new couch caused our entire apartment to be in a uproar-moving every single piece of furniture we own and emptying out every closet, nook and cranny. Putting things in storage, taking stuff to Goodwill, basically reevaluating my stuff-(this goes deep, deeper than you can imagine, that's why it hurts). Agonizing over every decision (exactly why I still have the big green chair) and wondering why do I have so much stuff!
All this was brought on by the fact that someone I have grown to love and depend on is moving-not far-but moving still the same. I haven't talked much about Janet on here because it is a big story and I haven't taken the time to begin from the beginning with this great story. So I'll just say for now, that Janet is my birth mother, and we met 3 years ago. One year ago she moved to Vancouver, about 15 mins. away from the "Shady Glen" (That's my new name for the apartment, it makes me feel special), and we have become close, friends, I don't know if friends can describe it. How can you put a label on what we are, we are family. She is having a chance to fulfill a dream of living by the ocean (one we share) and I will get to see her and enjoy good times at the beach...but still it is a change, I won't be able to call her up on the spur of the moment and say "do you want to go..." It will be different than what it is now, not necessarily better or worse, just different. Different for me is hard sometimes.
Add to this another change, our Ward boundaries were changed on Sunday. Our Ward had grown to 780 saints--too many. So now we are a member of the 1st Ward, Vancouver West Stake. I was just getting to know everyone, and make some good pals. They won't be going to 1st Ward with us, I won't know hardly anyone again-we'll be the new folks-again. Different-Hard.
My kids have thrown some change into the pot as well. Natie is planning a 5 month trip to Mexico to teach English, just talking about it and planning it makes me a little crazy...Mexico-5 months-Natalie-good thing it is far in the future and I can put it in the back of my mind for now!
Rachel and Casey are planning on big changes, he will be graduating soon and they have been looking for jobs and new places to live...Washington (yes), Arizona (no), Alaska (NO). Do they know what this does to a Grandma?!
And last night, I had to say goodbye-for real this time-to Draper. He had a bonus 72leave and flew home for a final goodbye before heading off to Afghanistan on Friday. My children are my heart, and with all this busyness of moving furniture and organizing I have been pre-occupied. Now I have space, and time to soak it in and I fear. I fear change because it brings with it the unknown, that is where faith steps in.
I keep thinking of Elder Wirthlin's last conference talk "Come what may, and Love it", wise counsel from his mother. He says "The Lord in His wisdom does not shield anyone from grief or sadness. How can we love days that are filled with sorrow? We can't--at least not in the moment. But I do believe that the way we react to adversity can be a major factor in how happy and successful we can be in life. If we approach adversities wisely, our hardest times can be times of greatest growth, which in turn can lead toward times of greatest happiness." Then he gives some great advice:
1. Learn to laugh
2. Seek for the Eternal
3. Understand the Principle of Compensation: The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.
4. Trust in the Father and the Son
So I will begin to trust and push away the fear, replacing it with faith. Because different is sometimes hard, but I can do hard things~ (The couch looks great, by the way!)
It all started with a "new to us" couch--yipee, something that I've wanted for sooo long (anyone who was acquainted with the old green dump of a couch we previously owned knows why), but still it was hard for me to do it; like maybe I didn't deserve a "new" couch, and maybe I am getting out of my comfort zone, anyway, the acquisition of said new couch caused our entire apartment to be in a uproar-moving every single piece of furniture we own and emptying out every closet, nook and cranny. Putting things in storage, taking stuff to Goodwill, basically reevaluating my stuff-(this goes deep, deeper than you can imagine, that's why it hurts). Agonizing over every decision (exactly why I still have the big green chair) and wondering why do I have so much stuff!
All this was brought on by the fact that someone I have grown to love and depend on is moving-not far-but moving still the same. I haven't talked much about Janet on here because it is a big story and I haven't taken the time to begin from the beginning with this great story. So I'll just say for now, that Janet is my birth mother, and we met 3 years ago. One year ago she moved to Vancouver, about 15 mins. away from the "Shady Glen" (That's my new name for the apartment, it makes me feel special), and we have become close, friends, I don't know if friends can describe it. How can you put a label on what we are, we are family. She is having a chance to fulfill a dream of living by the ocean (one we share) and I will get to see her and enjoy good times at the beach...but still it is a change, I won't be able to call her up on the spur of the moment and say "do you want to go..." It will be different than what it is now, not necessarily better or worse, just different. Different for me is hard sometimes.
Add to this another change, our Ward boundaries were changed on Sunday. Our Ward had grown to 780 saints--too many. So now we are a member of the 1st Ward, Vancouver West Stake. I was just getting to know everyone, and make some good pals. They won't be going to 1st Ward with us, I won't know hardly anyone again-we'll be the new folks-again. Different-Hard.
My kids have thrown some change into the pot as well. Natie is planning a 5 month trip to Mexico to teach English, just talking about it and planning it makes me a little crazy...Mexico-5 months-Natalie-good thing it is far in the future and I can put it in the back of my mind for now!
Rachel and Casey are planning on big changes, he will be graduating soon and they have been looking for jobs and new places to live...Washington (yes), Arizona (no), Alaska (NO). Do they know what this does to a Grandma?!
And last night, I had to say goodbye-for real this time-to Draper. He had a bonus 72leave and flew home for a final goodbye before heading off to Afghanistan on Friday. My children are my heart, and with all this busyness of moving furniture and organizing I have been pre-occupied. Now I have space, and time to soak it in and I fear. I fear change because it brings with it the unknown, that is where faith steps in.
I keep thinking of Elder Wirthlin's last conference talk "Come what may, and Love it", wise counsel from his mother. He says "The Lord in His wisdom does not shield anyone from grief or sadness. How can we love days that are filled with sorrow? We can't--at least not in the moment. But I do believe that the way we react to adversity can be a major factor in how happy and successful we can be in life. If we approach adversities wisely, our hardest times can be times of greatest growth, which in turn can lead toward times of greatest happiness." Then he gives some great advice:
1. Learn to laugh
2. Seek for the Eternal
3. Understand the Principle of Compensation: The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.
4. Trust in the Father and the Son
So I will begin to trust and push away the fear, replacing it with faith. Because different is sometimes hard, but I can do hard things~ (The couch looks great, by the way!)
Oh, Rebecca. What an interesting time you're approaching! I hope that Natalie has a great trip, that Draper stays safe and Rachel settles close to home. thinking of you!
ReplyDeleteohhh change, I can relate...different changes (i would love a new sofa). My head feels like a revolving door with all the change.
ReplyDeleteOh Rebecca Robinson....what will I do without you in RS? I really think you are a super wonderful person and I was really sad when I figured out that you were in the "other" ward. BUT! You will love 1st Ward...there are some wonderful ladies that you will get to know and they will LOVE you! Gosh I will miss seeing you.....until we meet again in the hall! Love Ya!
ReplyDelete